on the Final Harry Installment (spoiler-free as I haven't yet seen the movie)

On Thursday when I was getting my hair cut, my hair dresser (whom I love and adore and appreciate because not only does she revive my tired hair, she does so at a price that doesn't induce later let's-get-a-divorce-style arguments with my husband) had her TV on. A segment came on the Today Show with Daniel Radcliff and I desperately, desperately wanted to turn it up—but she turned it off! "I hope you don't mind," she said, smearing orange goo into another section of my hair, "but I'm just not a Harry Potter fan."

In my world that's like saying you're not a fan of chocolate, or going outside or, you know, breathing.

She went on to explain that she tried to read the books, but couldn't stop crying over this little boy being shoved into a closet with spiders and then this weird, giant, hairy man coming and kidnapping him from quite possibly the world's worst parents. "It's just all too dark!" she laughed. "I like happier books."

OK, I can understand that. Even though she was right at the spot where something goodhappens to Harry. Perhaps it's a result of all the other reading I've done that the super-early Harry trials didn't actually bother me. It's a book, so I knew that it would turn around at some point. Plus, as I've earlier (and probably more often than needed) stated, darkness doesn't bother me in a book.

So when I saw the title of this article, "A Mom's View: The Trouble with Harry Potter" I thought here we go. I assumed it was another one of those "Harry Potter is evil because bad stuff happens" rampages. I clicked on it, of course, so I could read it, get all up in arms, and blog about it. I was pleasantly surprised, though, because the writer has sensible advice, like the fact that yes, the last movie is dark so perhaps even if your seven-year-old is in love with all things Harry, you might not take him to see it in the theater. And that it's a parent's job to pay attention to what her kids are reading, not the publisher's or the writer's.

When the first Harry Potter movie came out, none of us had read any of the books. In fact, only Haley was old enough to know how to read at that point. The summer after the movie, I bought books 1-4 and read them to my kids. Then, later that fall, Haley took the books and read them all. She was in second grade and this reading feat still astounds me! When Order of the Phoenixcame out, I read it first, then passed it to her, but I didn't read it out loud to the boys. It felt too complicated and scary for a 4 and 2 year old.

I guess since he wasn't around for the excitement over the first four Potter books, Kaleb isn't really a Harry fan yet. Last night I was talking to Jake about when we'll see the movie. (Girls camp, long runs, work, Kendell's last days of class, some Big Picture deadlines, a funeral, Nathan's camp out, and other stuff are conspiring against us so we won't be able to see it until Wednesday or Thursday.) Kaleb piped up and asked if he could see it, too. "Definitely not!" I said. "It's too grown up for you." He protested a little bit, but then I pointed out the fact that he hasn't seen any of the other movies. "You wouldn't know what's happening anyway," I explained, and then I promised him: next summer I'll read the first four books out loud to him. That made him happy.

It makes me happy, too, because it means my own Harry Potter adventures—always very entwined with my kids' HP experiences—don't have to come to an end. Experiencing Hogwarts with a child makes it more magical, and I'm happy I can do it one more time. Because honestly: I almost don't want to see the last movie. Seeing it means that the Harry Potter adventures, which have impacted my life for the past decade in one form or another, are done. Absolutely I'll revisit them with Kaleb's hand in mine. But this movie is the last time it will be the first time.

I'm 100% certain my hairdresser would not understand this feeling. "It's just a book!" she'd say. But it's become a bit more than just a book. The Harry Potter thing wraps parents in its magic just as swiftly as it does children; that's part of its strengths. My kids love it and I love it, so it became a think that drew us closer. My three bigs, Haley and Jake especially, grew up along with Harry. It made all sorts of connections: to reading, to understanding and thinking about and loving story itself, to the pleasures of reading, to the discussions about good and bad and consequences and decisions. In that sense, the story must have those swathes of darkness. If it was all lightness and happiness, it wouldn't mean anything and no one would be drawn to it. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Comments

[Jennifer]

I understand the feeling you have about HP even though I don't have kids. I was first introduced to HP as a substitute teacher in a grade 2 class. I fell in love and bought the book to read for myself. I have been following along with the books and movies and remember the feeling I had when I saw the first book come alive on the screen. It was what I saw in my head as I read! As a teacher I love using HP to teach, as there are so many themes to pull from for all ages. This year, I was "slapped" by parents because HP is all about witch craft. The most frustrating thing is that they were not parents from my classroom, and the magic is not what I was concentrating on. I am still hurt by this, even though it happened months ago. HP can be a wonderful experience and while I appreciate the parents concerns, it's a shame they couldn't see past the witchcraft.

[Becky K]

I have love, love, loved the HP world. We went and saw the movie this morning, and while Shane will see the movie, he doesn't get into it. But, he also said this: "I don't have as much invested in it as you do." I thought about that comment for a while. I have invested a lot in HP - 9 years! He's been real, I've argued plot lines and debated theories and read and listened and watched. It is a fabulous series, and I feel like my world has been made better for it.

I hope you like the movie. I loved it! But I won't say more than that. :)

[Kim D]

You're right - the HP world can wrap you in its magic. My child has grown up along with Harry and we've enjoyed Harry's journey together. I'm sad this is the end, too.

[Janssen]

Bart and I went to see the movie last night and it was delightful. Oh, how I have loved this series.

[Apryl]

I love how it's a spoiler free post, even though HELLO, we all know how the movie ends. But it's true, I still don't want spoilers!!!! Ha!
I think what I love about Harry Potter is that the good people aren't all good, the "bad people" are complex and real (even He Who Must Not Be Named, we can understand how he became who he was). When people say that they can't let their kids read it because it's about witchcraft, that just helps me know that I can't be friends with them.

[elizabeth]

Matt and I devoured books 1-3, waited a painful wait for #4 (July 2000!) and I think made it through #5 all before we had any children at all. We're way behind in movies so won't be seeing Part 7.2 in the theater, sadly (and this is because while we went ahead and let Maddie read all seven books when she was in 2nd grade, we weren't ready for her to see all the movies out at that time yet...) Anyway. Our next door neighbor girl (11) isn't allowed to read Harry Potter at all because her family believes (as far as I can tell) that it is an invitation for the devil to live in one's house, and this makes me sad. Sigh. But here in our house, Harry Potter is impatiently waiting for Gracie to develop enough reading confidence and comprehension to crack open the first book next : )

[Britt]

This is a great post! As soon as I read that line from your hairdresser, I about died! You DO NOT say that to Amy! Tee hee!

I look forward to the day I get to read Harry Potter to my kids!

[heidikins]

I don't understand this Doom and Gloom "OH NOOOOES! HP IS OVER!!" business. Those books will be around forever. New generations will love them forever. You can re-read them and re-love them forever. That's the beauty of books, they last for as long as people will love them.

xox

[Judy]

I've loved the HP world too, even tho I don't have any kidlets to share it with and am a mmmhmmhmm-year-old single person! Yep, I stood in that midnight line to get the final book and slammed through it immediately so I wouldn't hear the spoilers, then went back and read it again slowwlly, savoringly, delightfully. Funny thing - I felt the "it's over!" sadness when I read the final book, but not when I saw the movie on Saturday. (You will love the movie, by the way.) I agree with heidikins - you can re-read and re-love the books for forever, and it will be a different magic each time. But I also agree with you - there will only be that first-time magic just once. I'm glad you blogged about it!

[Wendy]

I'm with you on anticipating the thrill of reading the books to my two little boys (possibly this fall). They have seen the first movie (which we own) and Sat. I purchased the second movie for a quarter - yippee!

I (believe it or not) have only read the first three). I absolutely loved them, despite the hype being given by ultra-conservative women in my church about how EVIL the books were (ha! - similar elements in C.S. Lewis, but he's ok with them). My problem was that I read them so fast (within a week) that they began to run together. Then, I thought I would read them aloud to Bryce, but he never agreed. I'm certain these boys will agree!

We are currently reading a complete boy-thriller: "My Rotten Life: Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental ZOMBIE" The boys are riveted. They are actually begging me to read a chapter (instead of their usual ritual of Daddy reading to them at night). Oh how I love books and the experience of sharing a reading with my kids!

[Ray]

My sweet wife and I did something completely out of character and went to the midnight premiere on Thursday night. In line with us, and seated next to us in the theatre, were a dad and his two daughters, aged 17 and 19. He had read them the first HP book when the girls were very young, and they had read all the books and attended all the movies together (including a lot of midnight showings). I'm sure this family was close anyway, but it was fun to see how the HP experience had strengthened their family bonds.

[Chris S.]

I love HP and really got into it before I had kids. Ash is just now getting into it and I'm loving sharing it with her. She's so sensitive to scary things and I know she couldn't handle seeing them in a dark theater. We watch the shows at home where we can pause it to answer questions and also to keep a few lights on. I haven't seen the last show yet but am hoping to this weekend.

[Helena]

We haven't done any Harry Potter with Kate yet (though she may have a vague idea of who he is--I'm not sure). Maybe next year.