Unbudgeable

Tonight, while working on revising some of my Textuality class (which is going to start up again on October 6), I did something I haven’t for awhile:

I ate a big bowl of my favorite ice cream.

(Breyer’s mint chocolate chip, if you’re curious.)

Why the hell not? Because here’s the deal:

I have been running a lot lately. A lot. Like 35-40 miles a week.

I’ve been doing sit ups and push ups and various other calisthenics.

I’ve even done some weight lifting and Pilates classes at the gym.

AND!

I’ve cut way back on my calories over the summer. Barely any sugar-filled drinks. Protein shakes or oatmeal for breakfast. Smaller portions at every meal. A drastic (although, granted, not total) cutting back of the cookies-candies-cakes-and-snacks food group. An increase in fruits and vegetables and whole grains. I haven’t put even a dollop of half-and-half on my berries.

I’ve been taking my daily vitamins. (B, D, E, calcium, and fish oil.)

I’ve been cooking with olive oil.

I’ve been sleeping more.

I’ve been drinking water.

And no matter what I do, the scale refuges to budge.

Before you say it, I know the argument: all that healthy stuff is causing me to gain muscle. Magic how that losing-weight/gaining-muscle balance remains exactly the same! Really, though, I know this isn’t true because my clothes don’t fit any differently.

Well, that’s not completely true.

My bras are now too big. (All of them, even my running ones, which has resulted in the most-unpleasant sort of chafing I've ever experienced.)

Sweetness! The one place I don’t want to lose any weight is the only place it’s melting away.

To say I’m frustrated is to understate the fact. Vastly understate it. Why is none of this working? Why does my scale refuse to budge? What am I not doing that I need to do in order to finally lose the last ten pounds I’ve been battling for two years now?

I was certain the marathon training would help. I mean, if you do the math, I should be able to lose a pound a week, because I am exercising nearly a pound’s worth of calories during my seven days. I’d even settle for half a pound a week. But even that regimen, while improving my endurance and even my speed a little bit—and giving me a wicked watch tan line on my wrist—is not bringing me any closer to my desire.

So tonight, I drowned my sorrows in ice cream. Obviously, that is not going to help my weight-loss goals. But somehow it feels like it won’t hurt them, either, as seemingly nothing can make my scale budge.

Comments

[Darla Maple]

I've always heard it comes off the chest first - so you are probably just on the brink of it coming off everywhere else. And wow! you should be very proud of what you have accomplished. I walk everyday and for a couch potato like me that is climbing Mt. Everest, but what you are doing is flying to the moon. I applaud you - don't give up. darla

[Maureen]

I would put Why We Get Fat and What to do About It by Gary Taub on your check out list. It has some interesting things to say about carbs. You may not want to go ultra low carb, but maybe a little less carbs in favor of some healthy fats will help tip the scale.

My favorite is Hagan Daz Chocolate Chocolate Chip, always bought a pint during finals.

[Susan]

I read somewhere in the last day or so about a gal who was exercising like crazy like you, eating all the right things, and the scale wouldn't budge. She started eating MORE, and the weight started dropping again. You might not be eating ENOUGH and with all the running, your body is trying to conserve what you're taking in!

I'm in your Writing Class, but I'm behind - just happened to check in on your blog today.

Hugs,
Susan

[Britt]

Dude! I feel the same way about myself! I've been eating very healthy and doing Kettleworx all summer and NOTHING! So I ate ice cream a few days ago, too! (Butter Pecan)

Sorry about the bras! That's a bummer!

[wendy]

My two thoughts are, a) your body is where it wants and needs to be, whether you like it or not, or b) you need to eat more before you lose more weight--you're not eating enough. Get more ice cream!

[Colleen Lesley]

I agree with Susan and Wendy. You probably need to eat a bit more!
I am like Susan, in your writing class and a bit behind. A four year old and 5 week old are competing for my time! Oh, and sleep too.

[Margaret]

Amy, I found your blog through the Big Idea Festival and I have been meaning to comment for several days now. As an ex-English teacher myself, I am just loving your writing style and your unique voice coming through in your posts, both happy and sad.

I look forward to taking Textuality. I missed it last go 'round and am thrilled to see it return.

I do hope you find some comfy, new running bras! Been there, had that awkward chafing. Not pleasant.

Here's hoping that one of two things happens soon: (1) the scale budges or (2) you find happiness right where you are.

Margaret

[Shaunte]

Can we go to lunch?
We can both order a big bowl of steam.
I am doing the same darn thing.
When you figure it out, shoot me an e-mail!

[Kim D]

You might need to do more strength training, but the advice that you might not be eating enough may well be the reason itself. Good luck.

[Pamela K.]

Kim D took my comment. I was going to mention to add some strength training in your fitness regiment. My hubby did the "Body for Life" weight-loss/fitness plan a few years ago. One thing mentioned is that you need to mix up your fitness routine in order to lose weight. But I'm sure you already know this.:-)

[Melissa Kaiserman]

Oh, Amy, I am completely commiserating with you. Turning 40 killed me. However, I'm not running even close to as many miles as you... I don't blame you at all for being discouraged. However, you are taking good care of your body, and you should be proud of that!