I realized last night at about 11:45 that I didn’t blog on Wednesday.
I’d been thinking about my blog post, but I got busy. Actually, not really busy. I’m currently obsessed with making log cabin squares. So I spent almost all day making them. And then I went to work. And then I got home late, and was tired, and ate a slice of pizza, and fell asleep.
But I woke up at 11:45 and it hit me I hadn’t blogged.
I thought about dragging my butt out of bed and writing something, just to keep the streak up. But then I decided not to. Too lazy? Too sleepy? Maybe.
But that little experience goes along with what I wanted to blog about anyway. So I’m going to pat myself on the back for blogging 8 days in a row. EIGHT DAYS. I haven’t blogged for even three or TWO days in a row for a long time. I’m just going to pick it back up again today and move on, because one of the things this 100-day experiment is teaching me is to think about my online life.
I had a conversation with some friends earlier this week about Facebook. They were talking about how they missed how Facebook used to be. People posting things about their lives, pictures and little stories. It’s different now, they both pointed out. It’s mostly politics and links.
“But I still post pictures and little stories on my Facebook,” I said. And they both said some version of, yes, we love that, but most people don’t do that anymore.
So I looked through my feed with a more critical eye and I realized they are exactly right. I do have some friends who post photos and stories on their pages. I still love that and I wish more people would do that.
But most of my interactions now on Facebook are inside the groups I belong to. I love these groups—people gathered to talk about the same topic, be it (in my case) scrapbooking and religion and running and books. But it is easy to feel like a tiny little insignificant part of the whole. It feels like a far less intimate connection. Or maybe personal is the better word.
That conversation and a few days of critical thinking about social media kind of made me embarrassed in myself. I know that I have a tendency to get too involved in Facebook or Instagram. I like to joke with a quote from Harry Potter: “It’s like having friends.” Social media makes friendship a bit easier because you can post whenever, you can write and edit before you actually communicate anything, you can do it all from your bed in your pajamas. I logically know that real-life interactions are far better than social media interactions, but emotionally, social media interactions fit will with my introverted little heart.
Somehow I didn’t really notice that I was clinging to something that many other people let go of long ago. Just like I still use WordPerfect even though no one else does, and just like I’m still scrapbooking even though all the friends I started with aren’t anymore. Or even like I still listen to music I loved in high school.
Or how I’m still blogging despite the fact that OMG Becky, no one actually blogs anymore.
I haven’t ever really thought of myself as someone who is resistant to change. But looking back, I can see how I cling to things. I find something that is comfortable for me, something I love, and I want to keep it around, even when it changes or becomes outdated.
I’m not sure I really have an answer. I might not even have a question. Is the problem that I need to disengage with social media? Or is it that I need to react to the reality that actually exists, instead of getting stuck in how the world used to be? Or maybe both?
I’m not sure. I do know this: I do miss people posting photos and little stories on Facebook. I will continue interacting with my friends who do. I might clean out my friend list so that I see more of what I like to see. And I’ll probably also keep posting in the way I have, but definitely with more self-consciousness.
What’s your relationship with social media like these days?